Obama Explains NASA Administrator Remarks

President Barack Hussein Obama today explained the embarrassing comments of NASA Administrator Charles Bolden, who described his “foremost” mission (as given to him by the President), was “to find a way to reach out to the Muslim world and engage much more with predominantly Muslim nations to help them feel good about their historic contribution to science, math, and engineering.” The President explained that “I merely want my fellow Muslims to stop using their aeronautical knowledge to fly planes into buildings.” The President also hoped that the “historic contribution to science, math, and engineering would be used for purposes other than blowing up buses, building tunnels for terrorists, or developing weapons of mass destruction.” It is believed that President Obama is using the NASA Administrator as a policy conduit “because it sure beats backing historical allies like Israel and forcing its warring neighbors to make peace.”

White House press spokesman Robert Gibbs expanded on the President’s remarks even more: “The President is setting a good example in science and engineering for the rest of the world. So far, his policies have given us some big numbers in spending and unemployment. We feel like NASA in this regard because the sky is no longer the limit.”

Cross-posted at Virginia Virtucon.

Top Ten Tasteless Jokes about Al Gore Having an Affair

According to the tabloid magazine Star, Al Gore allegedly had an affair with Laurie David, ex-wife of Larry David (creator of “Seinfeld” and “Curb Your Enthusiasm”). As of this writing, no one knows if this report is true, but tasteless humor can’t wait. Here are my thoughts about the alleged affair:

10. Lessons from Al’s old boss finally sunk in.

9. No cigars were harmed in this affair.

8. Gore got really good with “PowerPoint” presentations.

7. Here we always thought that Gore preferred “pie charts” to “bar graphs.”

6. “So I went to this climate change conference and . . . yada, yada, yada.”

5. Al must have viewed his marriage as “An Inconvenient Truth.”

4. Laurie affectionately calls Al mon petit chaud.

3. Al was just trying to prove that the “hockey stick” theory was for real.

2. Clearly, Al Gore was increasing more than his “carbon footprint.”

And the number one tasteless remark is . . .

1. Now we know what Phil Jones of the University of East Anglia Climate Research Unit was referring to when he wrote the e-mail that said “hide the decline.”

Wow, Tell Us What You REALLY Think

Here's a powerful ad from Les Phillip, a candidate for Congress in Alabama:



Ouch!

Coming Soon to Virginia

Fatalities from Dangerous Energy Technologies

Hat tip: Too Conservative

There has been a lot of debate about expanding new energy sources in Virginia and around the nation. As I have recently learned, some of them have been proved to cause fatalities in construction or operation. Remember, if it happens in Virginia, we can just say “Thank you, Bob McDonnell!”

See the shocking video below for more environmental damage caused by these dangerous technologies.



Cross-posted at Virginia Virtucon

My Evil Plan to Repeal ObamaCare

Hat tip: Yuval Levin at The Corner

To quote House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA), “[W]e have to pass the bill so that you can find out what is in it.” One of the interesting things we have learned about the 2,000+ page monstrosity passed by Congressional Democrats has to do with health care access for Congressional staff. According to David Freddoso in the Examiner,

Obamacare was intended, eventually, to push members of Congress and their staff out of the federal employees' health care plan and into the exchanges created by the law. The problem is, those exchanges won't exist for some time. And apparently due to an omission, the ban on offering the federal plan to Capitol Hill employees begins immediately.

The law states that "the only health plans that the Federal Government may make available to Members of Congress and congressional staff" are plans created under Obamacare or offered in its exchanges. According to a 13-page report from the Congressional Research Service, prepared a week after Obamacare's passage, this might mean that your congressman has no health coverage.

It's not exactly clear, because the law also contains a clause stating that no one can be forced to give up coverage they already have. "It is difficult to predict which provision a court would find controlling," CRS notes. At the very least, new hires on the Hill and new congressman appear to be out of luck when it comes to health coverage.

If this is true, it’s quite a testament as to how Democrats have not read their own legislation. As an aside, doesn’t it make you wonder how well Gerry Connolly (D-VA-11) represents all those Federal employees who are his constituents?

So anyway, let’s hope that Republicans increase their majorities over the next couple of election cycles to majorities in both Houses of Congress.. Even better, let’s get a Republican elected President in 2012. So what happens if Democrats try to block repeal of ObamaCare? Maybe the new President, leading a bunch of healthcare bureaucrats he inherited from Obama, can withhold health benefits from Members of Congress and their staff until obstructionist Democrats agree to repeal Obama’s socialized medicine and replace it with a superior free-market system. Isn’t that evil?

Hey, a guy can dream, right?

Is this for real?

32% off the price of a space shuttle. They are only $28,800,000 each and may include free shipping!

Surging, Shown Graphically

Or cratering, depending on your point of view . . .



Is this predictive of 2010? Time will tell!

Barack Obama Becomes Catholic?

I was perusing headlines on Drudge Report when I saw this item:

OBAMA GOES TO MASS.

So, it's Sunday, and President Obama is going to MASS? Then it dawned on me that the headline was referring to MASSACHUSETTS.

Has this kind of thing ever happened to you?

What Bill Clinton Wanted to Say in Massachusetts

Former President Bill Clinton took time off from helping the people of Haiti by appearing at a rally for Democratic Massachusetts U.S. Senate candidate Martha Coakley. Sure he gave a stump speech, but we think that if he were candid, he would describe Coakley in much the same way he allegedly described Barack Obama. So just imagine Clinton saying this:

"A few years ago, Martha Coakley would have been getting me a cigar!"

Don't let your imaginations run too wild!

For the First Time in 41 Years . . .

. . . I will be living for an extended period of time under a Republican Governor!

In case you don't get the joke, I grew up in Maryland, and moved to Virginia just in time for Mark Warner to be sworn in. Sometimes I thought that I was cursed! With any luck, the curse has been broken.

So yeah, the last Republican Governor under whom I lived (at least as a State resident, even though not one of voting age) was Spiro Agnew. Ugh!

Marsden Money Merry-Go-Round

Recycling Sham

Hat Tip: Riley

According to the Washington Post, Delegate David Marsden is renting a room in the home of some political supporters, the Sewards. The rent is $600 per month. But what are the Sewards doing with their newly found windfall? Just look it up on VPAP. Apparently, Ronald Seward of Burke gave $200 to Marsden’s Senate campaign in December, while his wife Paula gave $100 the same day (December 10, 2009). In addition, Ronald Seward gave Marsden’s Delegate campaign $475 in 2009 in addition to the above.

So for the State Senate campaign alone, half of one month’s rent has been given back to Marsden’s campaign. Quid pro quo? I wonder who is writing the rent checks.

What David Marsden Says in Front of Friendly Audiences

Scenes from a Debate

This past fall, my congregation hosted a debate between David Marsden and Kerry Bolognese for the 41^st House of Delegates seat. The congregation I attend is much more liberal than conservative, politically speaking, though people of all political stripes are always given a gracious welcome. Little did Mr. Marsden know that this blogger was present.

During the debate, the candidates were asked several questions submitted by congregation members. I am not going to recount every question and answer here. However, given Delegate Marsden’s claim to being “moderate,” I think that the highlights of his responses in a recent forum should be shared with the public.

David Marsden attacked the idea of a tax cut. He said that programs such as schools and roads that compete for funding would get hurt. He wants to give better funding to community colleges when the economy recovers. Unlike Kerry Bolognese, Marsden made no commitment to monitoring how money is actually spent.

Marsden insists that as a low tax State, Virginia does not have the money to get work done. The fact that Northern Virginia gets back only 30% of its highway dollars did not seem to bother him. Rather, he said that the 17-cent per gallon gas tax does not buy what it used to (despite the fact that Northern Virginia has a lot more people paying this tax).

As far as public-private partnerships are concerned, David Marsden thinks that the “public” part is just not there. Apparently, Northern Virginia does not have a lot of “shovel-ready” projects. Apparently, extending Metro to Fort Belvoir is a good idea in Marsden’s mind. (Ah, but aren’t we lacking in money?)

Marsden was most interesting when asked about waste that can be eliminated. When Kerry Bolognese recounted the Wilder Commission as well as specific items (and given the short time given for responses, no one can give a complete list), Marsden’s attitude was that it was like finding “$2.98 from couch cushions.” (his words) He thinks that we have reached a limit as far as cost savings are concerned while spending “needs” have been raised.

When asked about what pet project he would want to fund for the 41^st District, Marsden responded that he had introduced three bills to help clean up the Chesapeake Bay. These bills could create jobs for watermen. Marsden did not mention how many Chesapeake Bay watermen lived in Burke and Springfield.

On card check issues, when Bolognese noted what a disaster it would be, Marsden insisted that card check was compatible with small businesses. Of course, he gave the usual union line about how we owe having weekends to unions. He claims that he would only apply card check to large employers, though he did not give a specific figure.

When asked about fighting crime and gangs, David Marsden did support prosecution. He also mentioned having gang prevention activities and outlawing pneumatic weapons. Kerry Bolognese pointed out that Marsden opposed HB 1626, which would allow homeowners to protect themselves. Also, on crime issues, Marsden supports closing “loopholes” at gun shows and supports legislation to mandate background checks.

Finally, Marsden was amusing on other energy and environmental issues. He supports environmental initiatives that are “fiscally sound’ (of course), but then he said he supported setting up windmills in an old Ford plant. Marsden came out opposing drilling off the coast of Virginia, giving the excuse that it would interfere with Navy bombing exercises. He must be glad that his opponent in the State Senate race knows a thing or two about the Navy!

In summary, while Marsden has done a lot of admirable work in the juvenile justice field, has a long record of public service, and isn’t as radically pro-abortion as some of his Democratic colleagues, he is still very much out of touch with voters of the 37^th District and rather uncurious about government accountability. You would think someone with the long public service record he claims would understand where to look for cost savings, but perhaps David Marsden has grown comfortable in the fact that government runs on someone else’s money. Perhaps, in front of an audience he perceives as more liberal, he could be more candid about the kind of person he is. Voters of the 37^th District will be well-served by electing Steve Hunt as the next State Senator to get quality representation in Richmond.

Transportation Plan on Steroids

Wow, Talk About Building Bridges!

China to Build 31-Mile Bridge-Tunnel

I wonder what the tolls will be like?

A Full Plate

Some things I dare not post at Virtucon!

A man went to his dentist because he felt something wrong in his mouth.

The dentist looked inside and said, "That new upper plate I put in for you six months ago is eroding. What have you been eating?"

The man replied, "All I can think of is that about four months ago my wife made some asparagus and put some Hollandaise sauce on it. I loved it so much I now put it on everything — meat, toast, fish, vegetables, everything!"

"Well," said the dentist, "that's probably the problem. Hollandaise sauce is made with lots of lemon juice, which is highly corrosive. It's eaten away your upper plate. I'll make you a new plate, and this time use chrome."

"Why chrome?" asked the patient.

"It's simple," replied the dentist. "Dental researchers have concluded that there's no plate like chrome for the Hollandaise!"

GM Is Doomed

ReVOLTing?

Hat tip: Autobloggreen

Well, if they think this is a smart way to market anything!



Don't try this at home!

Anyway, REAL men drive diesels, not those fake hybrid things.

They Say We’re Smart in Fairfax County

A “Recycled” Joke?

A few weeks ago I took some oil from my lawnmower to the recycle center just off I-66 in Fairfax. (Yes, my yard equipment has four-cycle engines, not those two-cycle oil-burning Trabi jobs.) The County authorities have put in a lot of money to repave the roadway, mark lanes, and add new signage. Here is the sign at the used oil recycling station:

Something is not quite right. Here is a closer look at the professionally-printed sign. Notice that it has a bit of an error in it (red circling added for emphasis):

As luck would have it, VA Blogger links to an opinion piece by Pat Herrity in the Connection Newspaper in which he (Herrity) rips Fairfax County for its overspending. I'm not saying that fixing up the recycling center isn't a laudable thing for the County to do. However, as we can see from the pictures, Fairfax County sure got some quality for the money!

What amazes me even more is that our supposedly environmentally conscious elected representatives (COUGH Gerry Connolly COUGH) have not caught this error. Maybe they don’t do the recycling that they preach to us. Poor dears wouldn’t want to get their hands dirty, would they? Something very Al Gore/Tom Friedman/Copenhagen about all this, don’t you think?

Better still, the Northern Virginia leftist bloggers have not picked up on this, either. Not walking the talk either (on environment or education), are they?

Major Chemical Spill Reported on Virginia Political Blog

There Goes the Neighborhood

The good people at Virginia Virtucon have invited me to be a contributor. Watch out for the occasional words of wisdom to be shared over there.

Thanks for the invitation and for the kind welcome!

New Marsden Campaign Song

At This Rate, He Won’t Be “King of the Vote”

Thanks to Riley and BVBL for the inspiration.

So it turns out that Delegate David Marsden (D-41) has rented a little hovel so he can try to run for the State Senate Seat being vacated by Attorney General-elect Ken Cuccinelli. When I saw this news, a classic old song came to mind. You really don’t need to change the lyrics in the first verse, either!

Trailers for sale or rent
Rooms to let, fifty cents.
No phone, no pool, no pets
I ain't got no cigarettes
Ah, but . . . two hours of pushin' broom
Buys a . . . eight by twelve four-bit room
I'm a man of means by no means
King of the road.

Here is a comic version of the song featuring Dean Martin and Roger Miller:

You can also see a mash-up of the original Roger Miller song here:

Anyone who wants to have fun writing a parody, be my guest!

37th District Primary Avoided!

Result of Stimulus Spending

In a surprise announcement, the Fairfax County Republican Committee said that a primary was no longer needed for Virginia’s 37th Senatorial District to replace Attorney General-elect Ken Cuccinelli. “Thanks to the stimulus, we have extra Congressional districts, so two of the Republican candidates can run for those and leave the State Senate seat clear for the third candidate,” according to an announcement at the FCRC meeting. “One will be the 37th Congressional District, and the second one has yet to be given a number. It is possible that it will be three digits.”

The extra Congressional districts are believed to be the work of Democratic National Committee Chairman and part-time Virginia Governor Tim Kaine. “I am doing this only in part as a favor to Governor-elect Bob McDonnell,” said Kaine. “But before you raise your eyebrows too much, don’t just think that this is meant to benefit Republicans. Believe me, we’ll move someone into those districts to challenge the Republicans as well.”

Kaine added, “I initially pushed to create the extra districts for Creigh Deeds, Jody Wagner, and Steve Shannon. Jody has already snagged the ‘Zeroth’ district. I even wanted to designate a district for Leslie Byrne, but she just told me ‘Been there, done that.’”

Coming Soon to the HOV Lane?

“Clean, Special Fuel,” No Doubt!

Hat tip: Auto Blog Green

Rolls-Royce hybrid

So will someone try to make the case that they can drive this thing alone during rush hour on Interstate 66? Clearly, this is the perfect car for committed environmentalists like Barack Obama, Al Gore, and Mark Warner!