Saturday, April 25, 2009

School Daze II

I wrote a while back about problems we had in getting my son’s teacher to return tests and in class assignments. We were going around in circles, getting promises from the teacher that turned out to be at best half-hearted attempts to comply with our wishes.

We have some good news to report now. Finally, my wife did go to the principal. She figured that she does so much for other people, so she should at least stand up for her own son. We received a whole lot more tests back from the teacher that afternoon. Soon thereafter, other students started getting their old tests and classroom assignments returned.

Initially, we had been concerned about reprisals. However, we just got a report card for our son, and it shows vast improvement in his grades. So our fears were misplaced. It’s probably just as well that my wife went to the principal before I did. ;)

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

SeGMay

Let's play "Jeopardy!" with this one . . .
What you get when General Motors teams up with Segway to produce a vehicle?

Hey, it's better than PUMA, don't you think?

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Scoop: Jeff Frederick Replaced as RPV Chairman!

We have just gotten word that Jeff Frederick will be replaced as Chairman of the Republican Party of Virginia. According to sources, the White House has extended its strategy of replacing executives of companies to political party organizations. The new RPV Chairman will be none other than Senator Mark Warner (D). According to sources, Warner was judged to have the expertise in voter databases that political parties are said to need. In addition, Warner tours his own abilities to work with Republicans.

While Republican Gubernatorial candidate Bob McDonnell ponders the legalities of such a move, Governor Tim Kaine has been ecstatic. “Mark Warner has the gift of spending money like no one else does,” said the Governor. “He also can predict growth in revenue to match his spending, just like the Obama Administration is doing now. While the Republicans are our opponents, I wish them a lot of luck with Warner at the helm.”

It is believed that one of Warner’s first actions will be to activate a more aggressive fundraising effort for the RPV. “First, he will predict a budget shortfall,” said a source. “He will tax the local unit committees. He will promise a “Road to Richmond’ with the extra revenue, but will probably dole it out to special interests. Needless to say, it will be quite a Sprint.”

Various RPV members were unsure about Warner. “Well, we don’t really trust him,” said a member of the State Central Committee. “Then again, after Warner has been around, we could get quite a bailout.”

Marion Barry Now Opposes DC Vote in Congress!

Supports Elimination of Federal Tax for DC Residents

District of Columbia City Councilman and former Mayor Marion Barry (D-Ward 8) today came out in opposition to giving the District a vote in Congress. Barry declares that he would rather the Federal income tax were waived for DC residence. “I just had to get a new kidney,” said Barry. He then referred to his tax bill of $277,000: “These Federal taxes are costing me an arm and a leg!”

Mr. Barry was unconcerned that DC Delegate Eleanor Holmes Norton might be upset over his change of heart. “Let me tell you something,” said Barry. “The b*tch is setting me up!”

General Motors Extends Warrantees

Government Backing Makes Cars Last Longer

The new CEO of General Motors, Fritz Henderson, announced today that General Motors will extend its warrantees to 15 years and 200,000 miles. “My predecessor, Rick Wagoner, did not fully harness the powerful incentives created by warrantees,” said Henderson. Now that the Obama Administration is backing up GM warrantees, we feel that we can extend them. If this program works out, why, we may go for 20 year warrantees and higher mileage.”

Administration sources had no direct comment on GM’s action. However, an anonymous source said that “this is one more example of how we can ‘spread the wheels’ with our domestic auto rescue plan. The American people will never tire of this. No longer will the American auto industry be in suspension. I am surprised the White House is not blowing its horn even more about the warrantee plan”

Republicans were somewhat critical of the consequences of the bailout. Said a source at the Republican National Committee, “This is just one more left turn signal coming from Obama. Soon the whole country is going to fall out of alignment”